Part 13

Qian Yuan: Sounds simple but I have a question about that second one.

Qian Yuan: Normally, putting in fuel means that we put the dead in the very final train car.

Qian Yuan: But right now we're in the very first loop of the world of the 16th train car, and nobody's died yet, right?

Qian Yuan: Unless the young mistress would like for me to make a tribute of myself immediately-

Qian Yuan reached into her pocket where I knew she had a handgun.

Wu Shi: CALM the FUCK down.

Wu Shi: If we reverse everything, it probably means we're not putting in dead people.

Qian Yuan: Reversing it... so, putting in living people instead?

Se Yue: The original design of the Tour of Time utilized corpses whose perception of time was diminished, to forcibly create a nonexistent time to compress the clock and change absolute time.

Se Yue: So, if we reverse that, it means we need to utilize 《People Who Have Greater Perception Of Time》as fuel.

Qian Yuan: People with greater perceptions of time... what kind of people would those be?

Se Yue: Why, I see one of them talking to another one, right in front of me.

Se Yue: You two have experienced far more loops than any normal person, and thus possess far more memories and experiences of time than any other person here.

So the past loops weren't completely meaningless, then.

It was only because we'd had all of that 'time' that we could do this now.

Se Yue: The conditions are met.

Se Yue: The two of you will make for top-quality fuel.

Se Yue: By burning the two of you, I'll be able to leap through time, and arrive at the future.

The two of you will make for top-quality fuel. By burning the two of you, I'll be able to leap through time, and arrive at the future.

After finishing her speech, Se Yue grabbed pen and paper, and scrawled a huge amount of incomprehensible equations down.

Se Yue: Alright, that's the way it'll be.

After everything was ready, Se Yue stood up.

Se Yue: The calibration's finished.

Wu Shi: ...That was fast.

Se Yue: Qian Yuan, ready?

Qian Yuan: Of course, madam.

Se Yue: Just as with the rules for turning back time, the consciousnesses of both the user and the fuel will both be sent to the future.

Se Yue: But because you haven't died yet, Qian Yuan, even at the future, you won't suffer Lost Time Syndrome.

Se Yue: Once we reach the future, I'll go find Hengsheng, and to prevent exigencies, Qian Yuan, you'll go find Yu Guang.

Qian Yuan: Basically, just delay'em so they can't use the Tour of Time, right?

Se Yue: Precisely.

Wu Shi: So, I'm just guessing, but, Qian Yuan, is the reason why Yu Guang has a crush on you because you two met during the fire incident of last year at some point?

Qian Yuan looked at me with surprise.

So that was it, huh.

Looks like the two of them had a story that I wasn't privy to, then.

That must have been why, even though Yu Guang had no memories of the loops back then, some lingering traces of the emotions he'd felt for Qian Yuan must have stuck around.

Qian Yuan: ...How'd you find out?

Wu Shi: Oh, call it best-friend's-intuition.

His appreciation for you clearly exceeded the amount that one could accumulate over a single normal school year.

Wu Shi: Honestly, harder to not notice, really.

Qian Yuan: It's as you guessed.

Qian Yuan: I'd rather not speak overly much on the fire a year ago,

Qian Yuan: But...

Qian Yuan: I owe him.

Qian Yuan: I don't have the right to accept his feelings.

The incident from one year ago, it seemed, would be a scar on Qian Yuan's heart forever.

Hopefully Yu Guang could help her heal, eventually.

But now wasn't the time to ask in detail, anyways.

Se Yue: That's enough about Qian Yuan, for now.

Se Yue: Let's get back to business and jump to the future.

Se Yue: This does mean we'll only have fifteen minutes, though.

Wu Shi: It'll be enough. As long as you do as I instructed, you'll definitely be able to meet Hengsheng, and stop her.

Everything I'd set up was leading forward to this.

That was why I needed Se Yue and Ji Hengsheng to become friends, and why I behaved and spoke in the specific ways I did.

Ji Hengsheng would surely be waiting in the train station for my response, since I'd promised to give her a response there.

Se Yue: Well then, we'll be off.

Se Yue spoke the control phrase.

Se Yue: Detach the train car after the eleventh train car.

Because we needed the train to be shorter than the way it started, we detached every single train car after the eleventh train car.

The Tour of Time shook wildly.

Se Yue: Target time, December 3rd, 13th Hour.

Wu Shi: Sorry 'bout making you do something so unpleasant, lady.

Se Yue: It's fine.

Perhaps this was what it looked like to activate the time machine, from the outside? Both Se Yue and Qian Yuan were glowing with light.

Se Yue: After all, I'm an easily misunderstood person.

Wu Shi: How'd it go?

Se Yue: ...I think the plan succeeded...

Se Yue's expression looked rather gloomy, for some reason.

Se Yue: I can guarantee, at least, that Ji Hengsheng won't be using the Tour of Time before we reach Terminal Station.

Wu Shi: That's good! Oh, that's such a relief.

Se Yue: ....

Se Yue: ...You two take a step outside for a moment.

Wu Shi: Eh?

Se Yue: Didn't you hear me? Go step outside, shoo.

She pushed both of us out the door before we could raise an objection.

Wu Shi: ...What did she run into in the future that made her lose her composure??

Qian Yuan: Sighs. You know, despite being bound by the Se Family Rules since childhood, I've always hoped that the young mistress could be able to relax sometime.

Qian Yuan: Wu Shi-senpai, do your best, I'm rooting for you!

Wu Shi: Eh??

Wu Shi: W-wait. Qian Yuan, you just made an expression other than 'calm smile'??

Qian Yuan: I- did?

Qian Yuan: That can't be... not since one year ago...?

Wu Shi: ?

Qian Yuan: I... don't remember... anymore...?

At first we were all freaked out by Qian Yuan's loss of loop memories,

But, after thinking about it, it wasn't such a bad thing, y'know? Being able to regain her expressiveness and forget her past pain wasn't really even a bad deal for Qian Yuan.

It was Se Yue that I was more worried about. I didn't know what she'd seen in the future, but ever since she returned to the present she'd locked herself in her room and refused to come out.

It wasn't the first time we'd seen her do something like that, I supposed. She'd buried herself in her room in the fourteenth train car as well, and she certainly had the financial assets to become a NEET if she wanted.

Truly, the more you got to know the young lady, the more you saw her flaws.

Wu Shi: Heyo, I'm comin' in.

Se Yue: Wu Shi?

Wu Shi: It's only an hour before I'm going to die! Don't you want to see me one last time?

Wu Shi: So, what're you up to, princess?

Wu Shi: Trying to figure out a way to cheat the system and save me again?

Se Yue: ....

Wu Shi: Ha, guessed it, didn't I.

Wu Shi: Give it up, princess. You can't cheat time. Just accept that I'm going to die so that nobody else gets dragged into this.

Se Yue: ...Hengsheng cried.

Wu Shi: She cried?

Se Yue: Yes. I didn't realize- how cruel your plan for her was, until I arrived in the future and saw the effect it had on her.

Wu Shi: ...Still better than having her turn into S or dying.

Se Yue: ...I just need a bit more time.

Se Yue: There's got to be a way to save everyone and get a perfect ending.

Wu Shi: Absolutely NOT.

Se Yue: But-

Wu Shi: No, absolutely not, I've SEEN the loops where you get hung up on that. Do NOT do that again.

Se Yue: But... I cannot fail...

I hugged Se Yue and stopped her from descending any deeper into the despair spiral.

Wu Shi: You haven't failed, okay?

Wu Shi: In the world of the 13th train car, I saw the depths of the feelings that Hengsheng had for me.

Wu Shi: In the world of the 14th train car, I witnesses for myself your relentless determination.

Wu Shi: In the world of the 15th train car, I saw the you that, despite not remembering anything that came before, still reached a helping hand out to me- the you that was the Se family princess.

Se Yue: And if you die then all of that will have been wasted effort and none of it will have been worth-

Wu Shi: You're wrong.

Wu Shi: Because of all of those previous experiences, I've become capable of accepting my own demise.

Even though I was still attached to this world, I imagined I'd surely become a person that the me of the very first loop wouldn't even recognize by now.

That alone made me thankful for everything, up to now.

Wu Shi: And, I remember now.

Wu Shi: The person who saved me at the disaster a year ago- that was you, wasn't it?

Se Yue: Eh??

Wu Shi: I mean, I should have realized it sooner.

If even I can't save you, then nobody could save you.

Wu Shi: That's exactly literally your catchphrase, princess.

Perhaps in the many loops leading up to the final loop, it'd been Qian Yuan's brother who saved me in that fire and died afterwards; I had no way of knowing, since I had no direct memories of those loops.

But in the very final loop, the person who struck down Qian Yuan's nightmare and saved me as well, was, without a doubt, Se Yue.

Wu Shi: Really, that means that I was saved by you long, long ago.

Wu Shi: Ever after that, I've been wondering to myself, if there was something different about the meaning of my life, now.

Wu Shi: But now I understand.

Wu Shi: The meaning of everything up to now has been so that I could stand before you, now, and tell you:

Wu Shi: Thank you for saving me, back then- and for choosing not to save me, now.

Se Yue: I...

Whatever she was going to say was choked back by a rush of obvious emotion, which she had to put all of her energy into suppressing, probably because of some family rule or another.

Wu Shi: I'm grateful to you for giving me the chance to meet you properly.

Wu Shi: I'm grateful to you for all the time you've spent for my sake.

Wu Shi: I'm grateful to the Tour of Time, and to these loops.

I smiled.

Wu Shi: I'm glad to have the opportunity to decide how to say farewell to the world before I die.

Wu Shi: So, no matter how many times I loop, I'll always come to you and tell you, that you haven't failed.

I pulled away from her slightly, and she immediately lowered her head, hiding her expression from me.

Oh, this was probably a good time to let her know how I saw her. I'd told her in past loops but I hadn't gotten around to it in this loop, yet.

Wu Shi: Maybe nobody can stand by your side, but I can see through to your true nature, and I know who you are.

Wu Shi: Someone who displays an incredible pride despite the curses she bears- that's the you I know.

Wu Shi: You're not just a hollow shell bearing only a meaningless title of princess; the you shaped by and who lives by her own rules is the true you.

Wu Shi: And to me-

Wu Shi: The real Se Yue is the Se Yue who looks and acts like the princess of the Se family.

Wu Shi: And- that's the you I like most, too.

Se Yue: I... I...

Like she was snared by something invisible and formless, she was unable to say anything despite struggling against it for a long while.

No apologizing, no thanking, no expressing the true self.

Cutting off connections to others and allowing none to stand next to her.

That was why she couldn't respond in any way to what I'd said.

Wu Shi: Well, it feels great to finally get my feelings off my chest! I can go without regrets.

Se Yue: .....

Wu Shi: Well, seeya, princess.

I turned to leave, but before I could make my exit, I felt her grab my sleeve from behind.

Se Yue: ...Before you go- how did the- previous versions of me, in the previous loops, respond to those words of yours?

Wu Shi: Hm?

Se Yue: In loops prior to this- when I heard you say these things- did I- say anything back?

Wu Shi: Nah, you never said a thing.

Se Yue: .......

Wu Shi: Relax.

Wu Shi: No matter what world or spacetime,

Wu Shi: You'll always be the Se princess that you're so proud of being.

You'll always be the Se princess that you're so proud of being.

When I heard Wu Shi say that to me, my heart was filled with confusion more than anything else.

What about that 'me' was so worth being proud of?

He'd told me who I was, and gave me the answer I'd been searching for, for so long.

But I couldn't even answer his feelings.

No matter how hard I tried, it was like my mouth was sewn shut.

In the end, all I could do was let my hands go, and quietly watch Wu Shi disappear from before me.

Se Yue: So, in the end, facing an ending like this is entirely within expectations, isn't it?

So Wu Shi died, just like that, and nobody activated the Tour of Time for him.

Just how many times have you faced death, anyways?

Ten? Fifty?

Se Yue: ...There were many things I didn't get around to telling you, too.

A year ago, I went to stop the berserking Qian Yuan.

But it was too late by then.

A massive number of bystanders had been pulled into the loops of time, and become fuel.

Seeing that hellish landscape, I almost lost my self-confidence.

If the loops stopped there, then the deaths of the fuel was guaranteed.

And Qian Yuan would have to bear the weight of those lives.

Even though I'd declared my decision with a superficial bearing of casual ease, in actuality, under the surface my self-doubt was driving me nearly insane.

Was there a better way?

Was there a way to save more people?

Was there some principle I just hadn't found in time?

...The laws of the Se family gave me strength, but sometimes, they could also back me into a corner.

Surely you'd seen me exactly like this, in some previous loop or other.

Se Yue: ...Even up until the last loop, I still thought to myself, whether I'd succeeded... or failed.

And then, you appeared.

I saved you from the depths of the flames.

Heavily injured, you were sent to the hospital, and Hengsheng rushed over immediately.

Outside the hospital I saw her embrace your wounded form, crying her eyes out.

Se Yue: It took seeing you two for me to allow myself to believe that my choices were correct.

Just when I was about to let my tears fall, I felt a ray of light arise from within my mind, and steal away my consciousness.

Se Yue: Well, whatever. No time to waste.

All Cause led to Effect.

All the things that Wu Shi had done were to lay down Causes that would bloom into this Effect, ultimately.

flashback to Wu Shi saying 'sure maybe I could see myself liking the princess'

flashback to Wu Shi telling Ji Hengsheng to wait for him in the station

Ji Hengsheng: Shi-chan! You're here!

And then, later, I would use the Se family's advanced technologies and resources to compose digital deepfakes of Wu Shi, and send Ji Hengsheng falsified videos of him living with me and reporting his status to Ji Hengsheng, to create the illusion that he was still alive.

Best Girl: I understand.

Se Yue: Well then, take care.

I turned curtly and tried my best to exit the conversation as quickly as I could, but Hengsheng wasn't letting me go.

She grabbed my hand.

Best Girl: Yue-chan, wait.

Se Yue: Hmm?

I'd been through a lot of tribulations as the heiress, but I...

I was afraid to turn around, to see just what expression Ji Hengsheng had, on her face.

Ji Hengsheng, Forever Best Girl Fuck You Se Yue Ji Hengsheng For Life #HengshengSquad: Even from my own limited perspective... I'm so glad that Shi-chan chose you.

Her voice sounded so joyful.

Ji Hengsheng: Thank you for accepting him.

Ji Hengsheng: It might be difficult for you to tell, but over time I'm sure you'll find out all the wonderful things there is to love about him!

Ji Hengsheng: He may speak in a straightforward way, but Shi-chan is a gentler person than you could imagine.

I knew.

Ji Hengsheng: And though he's not all that smart, for those who are most important to him, he'll demonstrate incredible motivation.

I knew that too.

Ji Hengsheng: And he may look lackadaisical, but he always follows through on his promises and never misses his arrangements.

I knew that, as well.

Ji Hengsheng: So- so-

Ji Hengsheng: So he'll surely cherish you!

I knew.

I've always known.

Ji Hengsheng: You two are a perfect couple. I wish from the bottom of my heart for happiness for you two!

Ji Hengsheng: Let Shi-chan know I said all that, okay?

Ji Hengsheng: Let him know that... even if the one he picked wasn't me, in the end...

Ji Hengsheng: He will surely still find happiness.

Who is the true S?

Qian Yuan

Wu Shi

Se Yue

Se Yue: The real S... was me...

Se Yue: It was I who told Hengsheng everything...

When the train flipped over surprisingly, surely I also wanted to reverse time and save Wu Shi.

When the train flipped over surprisingly, surely I also wanted to reverse time and save Wu Shi.

But Qian Yuan's example told me just how dangerous such a thing was.

So, I told the activation phrase to Hengsheng, and gave her the crest.

The past me had confidence.

With how much she cared about Wu Shi, if she couldn't save Wu Shi, then sooner or later she'd seek my aid.

Se Yue: Using her as an experimental subject... that sure is the thing that a princess of the Se family would indeed do.

There was also another reason for this:

I could not fail.

In the case that Hengsheng failed, I'd take over as the operator and reset everything.

We would alternate operating the time machine, and control of it would only alternate between the two of us.

This malevolent failsafe gave me the confidence to challenge the grandfather paradox while still having the opportunity to keep myself from failure at all possible points.

And the best part of it all was:

I'd forgotten just how many evil plans I'd suggested to Hengsheng myself.

This way, I could ensure that none of my plans could be foiled by my own softheartedness and weakness.

There was just one thing left bothering me.

Why didn't she say anything about this to Wu Shi in the world of the 13th train car??

There was only one possibility.

Se Yue: I must have disguised myself as someone that she would absolutely not recognize, before imparting my plans upon her.

Se Yue: And, of course, I knew how I'd have chosen to disguise myself.

Se Yue: Fuck, I have got to stop leaving my anime convention cosplays on the train. I'm never going to be able to make my debut at Comiket with this costume now.

Realizing the truth, my chest felt heavy, as if someone had shoved a piece of lead into it.

At the start of everything, I'd told her that Se Yue had invented the Tour of Time, and thus seeded her eventual decision to seek me when she was in need of aid.

And I'd put on a cloak only available to the Se family, put on a mask, and handed the control crest and activation phrase ot Hengsheng.

That was why Hengsheng imitated me and disguised herself as S.

So the true cause of everything, the one who killed Wu Shi countless times... was me.